After having Codi, your thoughts turn to having another bub. My idea was to have our kids two years apart, which would put the trying month as August. As Codi’s birthday is the 30th of August I wanted to have a few more months past Codi’s birthday so that bub number two would have their own birthday. My ideal plan was for January to fall pregnant. Clay and I fall pregnant quite easily, but I became quite broody in November and had just stopped taking the contraceptive pill. You’d think I would remember to still take extra precautions as you do, but I think I got swept up in thinking that the pill was still in my system and it would be at least three months before I would fall pregnant, which would have been around Jan 06. To cut the long story short, I fell pregnant shortly after stopping the pill and deep down I didn’t fell ‘right’. My suspicions increased when only 7 weeks I started to experience cramping. In addition to this I started spotting the Saturday, bleeding more the Sunday and miscarried the Monday night after I had seem my ob and had been booked in. One thing I knew was that the cramping and bleeding over those days helped me come to terms with the fact that I was losing the pregnancy, before it was made official. I miscarried at around 8 weeks (only really 6 weeks old and not growing) the night before my booked in D&C, which still had to proceed as there was still tissue remaining, which I was grateful for having the op. I think I was more sad about the fact it was a set back, but knowing that too it was not really what I ultimately planned for, it gave me some reassurance. But don’t worry I still sobbed my heart out grieving over ‘what could have been’. I have always been a true believer in understanding the medical side of it, like not having a heart beat, being the size of a finger nail, helps to put things into perspective. But, ultimately it’s a feeling that mother nature’s looking after you even though you feel like you are walking alone in the wilderness you’re not. I think my husband has been all things for me and the support I have gotten from my mother’s group and close friends has been the one thing that has made me realize that many people go through set backs large or small, but the one thing that keeps you feeling special and thought about is being able to reach out and receive so much back. Now two weeks later, I am feeling very happy and focused on my little boy, knowing that when the time is right he will have a little brother or sister…

The only thought I have is that for my own interest would love to know just how common miscarriage is? What conditions where present before getting pregnant and how to increase your chances of a better bodily environment? How to be mindful of what has been known to attribute to miscarriages? How to understand what is happening to you? How to cope with the loss and move on? — Again these are the things I would have loved to have known even if I didn’t experience it, which now in this case I have. It would have been great to have been provided known resource on the subject matter say from my obstetrician or doctor etc. I might have a look on the web again.